For about a week. When I was 16. Long before she was in Penthouse.
A couple of months ago, I signed-up for Facebook. I was trying to find Loyola University Campion Hall Alumni for a basketball event I was planning, and one of the guys I haven't seen in a long time was on there. Facebook is pretty cool because you can anonymously search for people from your past, but you cannot get any further information about them unless they become your "friend."
In order to get in contact with Aaron, the person I found, I had to sign-up for FB (that's what the kids these days call Facebook for short), and create my profile which included having them search for people who know my by uploading my email contacts list. I also had to add background information about myself like where I went to high school, college, and grad school and the years I graduated, employment information, interests, family information, upload pictures. FB then sends email friend requests to people who are already on the service and you begin to add more and more people to your list.
I've been able to connect with people from my past that I have not spoken with in over 20 years. I also can keep in touch with friends/family who are already in my life, but this is another vehicle to get updates without having to do much more than look at my computer.
FB is a weird thing when it comes to connecting people.
Take, for example, the recent resurfacing of Cyndi's ex-boyfriend, Mike. She and Mike dated for seven years. She was dating him when we first met, almost 14 years ago. She wasn't just dating him, she was living with him. Cyndi and I were work friends when we realized that there was an attraction. I went away for a business trip one week. To Maryland. When I returned, Cyndi invited me to drinks after work. It wasn't anything unusual because we had talked about going out for drinks before I left, but never found the time to do it.
I followed her to TGI Friday's in Vernon Hills, and the moment we sat down, ordered a drink and it arrived, Cyndi confessed to me that she broke up with Mike while I was gone, and moved out.
The rest, as they say, was history. 14 years later, we have a great marriage, which is built on trust and mutual respect. Cyndi is a great mom to our two children, and because she homeschools the kids and I work from home, we get to spend an unusual amount of time with each other (at least in each other's presence).
Over the years, Cyndi and I have never been threatened by each other's past, or by jealousy which can seriously damage a relationship. When Cyndi told me last week that Mike had sent a friend request to her best friend, Tressa, I had a mixed reaction.
Mixed because I had not thought about him in ages. Mixed because I figured it was only a matter of time before either one of us had to deal with the prospect of getting contacted by an ex to be his or her friend on FB, which is fine.
And then I remembered Andrea Kurtz.
When I joined FB, it suggested that I may know Andrea because we both went to and graduated from Conant High School. She and I had many mutual friends on the service because during my junior year, we were friends. Andrea was involved in beauty pageants when we were in school. Since it's been so long, I cannot remember all of the details, but there was one pageant she was in that I attended. I went with a few people (I cannot remember all of their names, but I remember Blake), sat in the audience, and rooted for Andrea to win. I cannot remember if she won or not (my mind tells me she didn't), but for a week after, Andrea and I dated.
We dated for about a week (if that), and quickly realized that our relationship was better off as friends. The romantic sparks were not there for us. We repositioned the friendship, but as teens are want to do, our friendship quickly moved to the side for the remaining time we had at Conant. I've never put Andrea in the "ex" category; she's always been listed in friends in my memory.
I hadn't given much thought to Andrea since then. When FB suggested we become friends, I began to remember the story I just wrote. Andrea sent me a friend request and I accepted. On her profile, I learned that Andrea was living in Australia with her fiancee. I learned that she had a daughter. I also learned that she in 1997, she posed for Penthouse.
Andrea had a few pictures from the night of her pageant. In one of them, I am wearing a horrible suit, holding up a bunch of flowers. The image struck me funny because I didn't really think that people remembered me from high school. I know I had friendships and hung out with people, but, as I have written before, only one friendship has endured the years.
I've since gotten requests from many people I went to high school with, and while I have not reconnect with anyone outside of the world of FB, I am somehow part of the "cool" crowd (if you consider FB cool).
In an essay, I once wrote that graduating high school is like crossing an imaginary finish line, where segregation of groups is immediately eliminated. People are no longer classified as jocks, or druggies, or geeks, or loners, or exes.
Facebook has helped prove my theory. I have way more friends on this Internet based social network than I ever had in high school itself.
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