Public Grief

My family is not the Kennedy's. We don't have "old" money (I wouldn't call our money new either. Maybe the better term would be "used" or "borrowed"), we don't live on a compound, our lives are not followed by the media, we are not political figures (although my mother is the president at her synagogue, and I sit on the parish pastoral council at my church), and we don't say "er, uh" before most of our sentences. We have, however, experienced our share of loss. I feel bad for the Kennedy family; losing two people from the same generation in a two week period. That's got to be devastating for any family, let alone one so public as theirs. They just finished the burial and funeral activities of Eunice Kennedy, the 4th sibling of nine, and the 7th in the clan to die. They were all probably moving toward the closure stage of the grieving process. This morning Ted Kennedy, the youngest of the clan, and 8th member to die, passed away. The death of these two Kennedy's, leaving Jean as the only living sibling, is certainly telling. What I mean is the end of a era truly is near. The end of a generation, really.

There were four total siblings in my family. We lost my sister, Michelle, very early. She was only three months old; born before me, so I never had the opportunity to meet and grieve her death. I've always felt like I miss her. As if she and I did have a relationship. It's the missing limb kind of thing. She's not there, but I feel her phantom presence. I've often wonder what life would have been like for our family if she did not die so young.
Being part of a larger crew like the Kennedy's, allows certain luxuries in life, I believe. You have a chance to form bonds with your siblings in different ways. What might be cool about that is the sheer amount of relationships you can have. My brothers and I each have a unique relationship. But triple that, and I can't even begin to imagine what life would be like. Not that it's necessarily bad now.

When someone as famous as Ted and Eunice die, I also think about my own death. Each of them have received volumes of information written about them in newspapers, on web sites, on television. They led very productive and public lives, so I understand everyone's curiosity. I just wonder how I would need to change my life to move into their league. Could I change my life so much that I would get such an outcry of public grief? Would I want to change my life for this? Is it all worth it?