A couple of weeks ago, on Facebook, I posted a picture of Frederic playing in his first chess tournament. Jason Cooper, a friend of mine from work (everyone calls him "Coop" but I call him Jason. I've only known him for 10 months. I figure I haven't earned the right yet), saw the picture and posted the following line: "Pawn to Rook 4.....Pawn to Rook 4...... No................Why don't you just give him the King........" in reply. Jason's a master at remembering obscure lines from movies and TV. I mean, he pulls them out of nowhere sometimes. He's very entertaining. This one is from an SNL skit where Jim Belushi is a chess team coach and overreacts at a bad move. It's supposed to be funny, but I've been to three tournaments now and I've seen how kids and parents get upset. Chess is an intellectual activity and attracts all kinds of people.
In appreciation for an essay I read today while I waited for Frederic to compete in another tournament, I thought I'd follow the author's lead and steal her style (thanks, Sandi):
That I'm not the dad who begins to "school" his son who was completely not interested in why he lost, or why he had to play chess rather than play outside with his friends in 50+ degree weather. That I'm not the dad who brought his laptop to the tournament which had a chess program on it to show his son what he could have done to not lose in that situation again. That I'm not the dad who dropped his son off at a hotel in the suburbs and dis not stay to make sure his son has support and is safe. That I'm not the dad of the son who gets dropped off at so many events that he says he's used to it and even prefers it so his parents don't embarrass him in public. That I'm not the dad who has three thick chess books, one about "End Games" in front of me to review while my son is in the other room playing the game. That I'm not the dad that hovers over his son during breaks in the rounds. That I'm not the dad who hovers over the pairings listings, writing down the results and scores on a separate piece of paper.
That I let my son play with other kids during breaks in the rounds and hears him call the new kids "friends." That I am like the mother who I overhear tell her son that he's there to have fun and that she loves him no matter if he wins or loses. That I am a dad that plays chess with his son in between matches. That I am not the dad who won't let his son bring his chess set over to another table and play with other kids. That I didn't bring Cyndi and Lily with us to hang around a meeting room at a Renaissance Hotel in Northbrook for five hours on a 50+ degree day in March.
That I am sufficiently creeped out by the old man in a trench coat and top hat who is allowed to play chess with children in the Open section.
That I am a little nervous for Frederic when he goes into the fourth and final round. That he is in 4th place. That the three kids ahead of him are all undefeated and rated. That I know and he doesn't that he is the only non-rated player who is up against an undefeated kid with a 327 rating. That I cannot read my book while he is playing his final round because, while he plays in these tournaments just for fun, I kind of wish he could take a trophy home instead of adding another one of the medals they give out to anyone who places 6th or lower. That when he tells me he has lost to the undefeated kid with a 327 rating, I may be more disappointed than he is. That I am sad he keeps taking 6th. That he wants to hang around to see his new friend get 1st place even though he will not get a trophy.
That I spend more time with my son doing extra curricular activities than my father did with me.
That I am able to spend time with him on a Sunday afternoon.
That he literally just told me, "you're a good dad."
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